Inside the Life of an Introvert

[noun]: a person characterised by concern primarily with his or her own thoughts and feelings

ALTERNATIVELY: a term used to describe a person whose motives and actions are directed inward. Introverts tend to be preoccupied with their own thoughts and feelings, and minimise their contact with other people. The introvert is likened with Apollo, who shines light on understanding; the introvert is focused on the internal world of reflection, dreaming and vision. Thoughtful and insightful, the introvert can *sometimes be uninterested in joining the activities of others - Carl Jung [Psychological Types, 1921]

* always

|   "Every introvert alive knows the exquisite pleasure of stepping from the clamour of a party, into the bathroom and closing the door"

2. We crave our own space all. the. time.

3. We willingly saying no to hanging out with people and we wear thin the excuse "my mum said no" even though we're 21 years old, and by definition, an "adult"

4. We will stumble around cluelessly in the supermarket looking for an item in the wrong aisle because we'd rather do that for fifteen minutes than ask a customer assistant for help

5. We will willingly work the night shifts on our part-time job because the shop is closed to the public and we can happily work the deliveries and tidy the shop floor without having to interact with humans

6. We deliberately let the phone ring - and ring and ring and ring - until it goes to voicemail. And maybe (just maybe) we'll reply to the "missed call" via text message, with a meek "Sorry I missed your call! I was in the bath" - complete with a facepalm emoji

7. We prefer to use the self-checkout than interact with the till assistant (NB: best case scenario is shopping online - and forget "free click and collect!", home delivery is the way to go)

8. We will memorise directions to so-and-so place, from its exact location to the number of bus stops, lefts and rights it'll take us to get there, because we don't want to be caught in a situation where we have to ask a stranger for help

9. We would rather email customer service with an issue and be quite happy waiting seven days for a response, than ring up the company and go through the painful process that is a phone conversation

10. If - and only if - we absolutely have to make the phone call, we will carefully and meticulously plan out an entire phone conversation for an agonising 24 hours beforehand, and there is a 99.9% chance that we will panic and stumble on our words if it does not go according to script

11. We will voluntarily eat lunch alone with just a book for company

12. We will spend every second of our free time engrossed in a book until we're in danger of going blind, finding our comfort not in talking to people, but in imaginary worlds and pages drowning in ink

13. We will bail out on Friday night plans because we have a date with our fictional boyfriend

14. We will reluctantly celebrate occasions and go out on a social call but after a while, we find ourselves desperately wishing we were at home in our pjs

15. We constantly deflect attention away from ourselves

16. We will sit alone in lectures and avoid people because it eats away at our peace of mind

17. We will make one good friend on our course, and keep them close for the next three years without bothering to broaden our friendship circle

18. We desperately hope and pray, and pray and hope, that people stay away from us - at all times

19. Our dream job is one where we can be alone and isolated with just our thoughts for company - "me, myself and I"

20. We become deliriously happy at any life situation that miraculously results in zero human interaction

21. We are uncomfortable meeting new people and when we do, we immediately wish we were anywhere but in their presence

22. We are awful at making conversation but we can hash out a blog post that nails everything we want to say, down to a T, no problem

23. We have the same social circle consisting of six people for eleven + years

24. We are reserved and we hold back; building concrete walls and keeping them up are our secret talents

25. We feel suffocated by small talk and we are constantly needing to escape the clutches of conversation

26. We find peace in solitude (and find it absurd that people get a kick out of interacting with other human beings)

27. Home is our escape, and the outside world is our prison